It has been a full year! Wow I must admit this is pathetic. A whole year since my last blog. Many ups and downs. At times the downs seemed to be taking over. We have survived prostate cancer and now diabetes II. I told my husband the deal was you were not supposed to get sick this summer. I absolutely forbid it! So I guess I am still not in charge. I think the saddest part of my year was losing my high school friend Mary to the evil-C ( as she called it). Mary and I reconnected on a classmate site. It was so fun catching up and we continued to keep up with each other on FB. I met Mary in the 8th grade. I was new to this particular small MN town and she was nice to me within the 1st couple of weeks of school. We lost contact for years and then poof Mary reentered my life. I got to see her last May. It was as if no time had passed at all. We shared so many interests with the most important being our kids and grandkids. I know she is with Jesus, but I miss her so. We will meet again sweet friend. Billy and I have had many ups and downs with our parents. Most recently with my mom being in the hospital. I really thought I was going to lose her. She had some sort of wacko throat infection. She was on a ventilator for 3 days. Her heart stopped 3 times. At her age of 85 they will let them go when the heart stops. Mom's heart just started beating on its own. God is not finished with her yet. All of this to say life is not easy and finding joy within all of the chaos is hard. Billy and I were talking about where had our joy gone. He mentioned "the joy of the Lord is our strength". I pondered on that all day today. I was putting all of my mother's things away after moving her to a new room. I watched her sleep and really thought how does the joy of the Lord affect me? I seem to lose it at the drop of a pin. I eventually find it, but always the long way around. Do I grow on those detours? I don't think so. They are my detours. I choose a different path when I step away from joy. So in essence I am stepping away from the Lord who is my joy. The key is my joy means nothing. "The joy of the Lord is my strength." I think he takes joy in me when I remain close to him and let him take care of me. Not my joy in the Lord, but the actual joy of the Lord. I think the sweet name of Jesus is joy, his presence in my life is joy. I remember telling Mary a couple of months before she left this world that sometimes just saying the name of Jesus will give you that sweet peace. She told me that she had done that many times when she was afraid or sad and it was working. We can't work for joy He is joy! I am praying that God will remind me of that daily. God never moves it is always me. I am so thankful he is true to his many promises. "The joy of the Lord is my strength"! Now that's a good one.
You know I really do like blogging.